I feel as if I am breaking
My memories are ruptured
into bits that have never been put back together
They don't know how
These fragments have gone astray and I've let them
as a result of fear
of involuntarily participating
in these mad sounds
that are silently harmonizing
with a planned out rhythm
This is called sadness
When it feels like an allergic reaction
Closed throat
Recognizing a body-wide heart throb
and it's not good
This thought alone, scares me
because I know why they have dispersed
I ran them out of town
and this is what's left
I've grown bitter and unsatisfied
with having to face a truth that hurts
Knowing that your simple existence is just that
Simple or lacking complexity in built
I grow silent knowing this
and now silence is all I know
It has matched the silence that has prevailed
for some time now
I've stopped fighting it
But I fear the next time it surfaces...
~Tina Meeks
